Good morning otakus, and welcome to the Fullmetal Narcissist anime blog! Two weeks ago, I took aim at one of the most popular not-anime shows in recent memory. I sank my teeth into it, and shredded it to itty bitty pieces. But you know what? I’m not entirely satisfied yet. I want to take those pieces and shred them into even tinier pieces. And today, I’ve decided to do that by creating my third ever “Inconvenient Questions” post. Of course, since I had 222 questions to ask, I’ll be splitting it up a bit… 111 today, and 111 next week!
As with my previous entries, I will warn you; There are spoilers here, and since I’m going in sequential order, it’s probably best that you watch along while reading this.
1: How the hell is that guy answering the exposition?
2: Why would weaponized crystals be kept under a sheet of breakable glass, guarded by one old man?
3: Why IS this dust shop open so late, when it’s so easy to rob?
4: What does Roman mean by a smaller, more honest soul? Why did he say that?
5: Why do the crystals need to be uncut?
6: If they’re not here for money, why is that Henchman robbing Ruby?
7: Where does she keep her scythe when not using it?
8: Does she have an off screen inventory, like in a videogame?
9: Having seen what kind of weapon he has, how did she propel that guy across the room?
10: How was she able to do it to the second guy without being killed?
11: When did she go outside?
12: How did she get that giant scythe through the door so quickly?
13: Why doesn’t she get arrested for damaging the pavement?
14: Why is Roman still trying to fight her? Isn’t he even going to TRY and give her the opportunity to but out?
15: Was Roman’s escape vehicle just conveniently waiting for him behind a random building that he happened to climb up?
16: How did he get inside of it? Did he just jump?
17: Where did the blonde woman come from, and how did she know she was needed?
18: Does this woman really get to arrest and detain somebody?
19: Okay, so, when Ruby went after Torchwik, she left behind several of his minions unconscious. If this schoolteacher has the right to arrest, detain and interrogate people, then why does she do it to Ruby, and not any of the minions?
20: If Grayhair is giving Ruby cookies, does that make him the good cop?
21: Will we ever get to meet the teacher she’s referring to?
22: Hasn’t she ever eaten cookies before? Seriously, she’s eating them like she really, really wants diabetes.
23: How are giant cookies immediately disappearing into her tiny mouth?
24: Why is she pantomiming martial arts when she never actually uses it?
25: Did she honestly eat that entire tray of cookies?
26: Why does he let her into his school so easily?
27: If her sister has a traditional sounding asian name, why does she look more american in design?
28: I thought she wanted to be a huntress. Wouldn’t that mean NOT being a normal girl?
29: Why does the holo TV just randomly flicker on in the middle of a news story?
30: How is a guy who strolls through the street at night with several armed henchman able to avoid authorities?
31: Where is that hologram being projected from?
32: What part of Glinda Goodwitch’s speech do the new recruits not already know?
33: Glinda Goodwitch? Really?
34: Does Yang have a life outside of being Ruby’s sister?
35: What’s up with the Chibi? Can we never do that again?
36: Why do Yang’s friends never show up again, let alone have faces?
37: What happened to the cart those bags were sitting on?
38: If those dust vials are sealed up tight, why are they leaking?
39: If they leak that easily, how are the insides of that bag still clean?
40: How did the fire sneeze not burn her?
41: Why is Blake walking away from the school?
42: Putting aside the question of why you’re using Joan of Arc as a character basis… If you’re using the french pronunciation, wouldn’t it make more sense to call him Jean D’Arc? Instead of Jean Ark?
43: Where does the bulk of her weapon go when it shrinks?
44: Did he really help her out? She could have gotten back up on her own…
45: How did they find their way back?
46: Does having a detailed appearance mean you’re important to the story?
47: Why does Yang sound like the girl from Gravity Falls?
48: Does Ruby have ADHD? I’m not joking here. She zones out way too quickly while Weiss is talking.
49: How is Weiss holding the pamphlet?
50: If there are so many students in this room, then why are there only three teams decided later on?
51: Who cares if he’s a natural blonde?
52: She’s writing at night? What’s lighting her?
53: A 100 percent increase from zero is still zero.
54: Where did Ruby get two pillows to throw at Yang, plus the one she’s using?
55: Why is Blake using a candle to read, when most Faunus have perfect night vision? She’s a cat girl… Cats can see in the dark…
56: Why doesn’t Ruby bring up any specific books or authors? It’d be a good way to find a connection…
57: How can Blake say the real world isn’t the same as a fairy tale, when she is literally talking to Red Riding Hood and Goldilocks?
58: Why is Nora explaining her friendship to the very first person she’s friends with?
69: Does she comment on how long they’ve been together… And what she exactly means by together… Every time he wakes up?
70: Why is it taking him so long to cut pancakes?
71: Is that a co-ed locker room? Really?
72: Who ever refers to their sibling as “My Dear” when they’re not being sarcastic?
73: Who wrote that line about drinking milk, and why haven’t we executed him yet?
74: How does Weiss know Pyra is the strongest girl in class, if they haven’t even had a class together yet?
75: If Weiss was having a soliloquy, how did Jean respond to her?
76: Pumpkin Pete’s? Just… Pumpkin Pete’s? Did you include an image of the box just so I wouldn’t have to ask if I heard that correctly?
77: If it’s not very good for you, and it tastes like pumpkin, then why would anyone buy it?
78: Why would an athlete be pictured on a box of cereal that’s not good for you?
79: Who said anything about him being a leader?
80: You’re sorry, after throwing a javelin at him at point blank range?
81: Okay, so, they’re supposed to have teams of four, but it’s possible some of them will die. And yet there’s twelve people. What will they do if somebody DOES die?
82: Why doesn’t he listen to Jean’s question?
83: How do such small launch pads manage to propel entire people that far into the air?
84: How does Ruby hook her scythe on a tree branch without cutting it off?
85: From that distance, how do Pyra and Jean hear each other?
86: Why are Ruby’s thought balloons being shows in the style of Legendary Frog?
87: Why did being pinned against a tree by a javelin that caught him out of mid air not kill Jean?
88: If he could survive that, where’s the harm in letting him fall?
89: Why and how did the world suddenly get dark like that?
90: Why does Yang care so much about one strand of hair?
91: Why aren’t those monsters just ganging up on Weiss?
92: Why would Ruby strike the very same bear that Weiss is aiming for?
93: Why aren’t the monsters giving chase? Because of the fire?
94: Why is Ruby complaining, when SHE is the one that screwed up?
95: What is up with that feather falling down from the felled tree? Does that ever come into play later?
96: How has that fire not spread and become a huge problem?
97: Does the word “Aura” really sound like a sneeze to Jean?
98: How does Pyra know that the monsters don’t have souls?
99: Where did Pyra learn to unlock peoples’ auras? Aside from now, when the hell would that come in handy?
100: Did Nora really just sit in the tree and watch as her life long friend battled two giant snakes?
101: How does Glinda Badname know what teams are forming?
102: Why is the Professor such a dick?
103: Is Ruby just getting less and less likeable?
104: How is Jean inches away from a giant scorpion’s stinger, but somehow not dead?
105: What was the giant scorpion doing in there?
106: These monsters are really going easy on them, aren’t they?
107: So Ruby and Weiss are riding a giant bird. Is this connected to the feather that fell from that felled tree? How? Did the bird hunt them for revenge? No, it can’t be… This was Ruby’s idea. Could somebody explain this sequence of events for me?
108: Why did Weiss follow this idea, if she knew it was a bad one?
109: If the four bullies have already obtained their artifacts and left by now, wouldn’t that make them the most competent team in the class?
110: What made Yang blow up like that? Was it Nora being a spazz?
111: Why doesn’t Weiss just fall off and use her glyphs to get down?