50 Signs That you Watch Too Much Red Vs. Blue!

1: You sometimes refer to yourself as your home state.

2: You understand why nap time comes before pants time.

3: You try to fix your car by talking to it.

4: You think Canada is Spanish for You’re Welcome.

5: You’ve tried to find Spanishland on the map.

6: When you’re in trouble, you blame your AI.

7: You’ve tried to pick up chicks in a tank.

8: Your favorite password is Password.

9: You’ve called somebody a cockbite before.

10: Whenever someone calls something pink, you correct them and say it’s lightish red.

11: You always have at least ten dollars on you, just in case.

12: Your baby’s first word was Shotgun.

13: You have 40 different Zombie survival plans.

14: You’ve gone to Taco Cabana just to hear the music.

15: You can’t tell the difference between orange and yellow.

16: You’ve tried convincing your friends to play Grifball with you.

17: For Halloween, you’ve dressed up as El Cheapo, The Human Coupon!

18: You refer to Red Bull as Oblivion.

19: You sometimes confuse the words “pacifist” and “pedophile.”

20: You’ve accused a bird of fucking with you.

21: You’ve hurt yourself slipping on the spleenball.

22: You’ve summed up someone’s story by calling them a gay robot.

23: You think Roosters have teeth.

24: You’ve practiced Sarge’s “Stop, drop and roll” technique.

25: You think pirates have a southern accent.

26: You punch people when you hear the word “dirtbag.”

27: You sometimes answer questions by saying “Honk Honk Blargh.”

28: You go door to door, spreading the good word about The Flag.

29: When you go camping, you call it a legitimate strategy.

30: You invited friends over, with pizza and everything, just to watch the next season’s trailer.

31: You suck up to your boss, but only so you can be in the running for his job.

32: You’ve thought about joining the army for a laugh.

33: You laugh whenever you hear a story about a church in Texas.

34: Your shopping list has headlight fluid listed on it.

35: While playing Halo, you use terms like Puma, Dibs, and Le Pesado.

36: Whenever you stub your toe, you beg your friends for some Aloe Vera.

37: You think electricity is some kind of invisible magic.

38: You scour Halo for a Ghost Bullets upgrade.

39: You tell people you hate babies.

40: You’ve tried to track down Donut’s fanfiction.

41: You’ve added “Bow-chicka-bow-wow” to your vocabulary, and not because of Mike Posner.

42: You won’t use the plasma pistol out of fear for your reproductive future.

43: You faithfully follow the vowel diet… By eating Oreos.

44: You still wonder whether command wanted to promote Tucker or Church.

45: You’ve tried to convince the dictionary people to change the spelling of caboose to cabose.

46: You refuse to live in Florida, just in case.

47: You’ve fantasized about taking invisible naps.

48: You refer to Wal-mart as “Blue Base” and Target as “Red Base.”

49: You can’t talk without bobbing your head up and down.

50: You sometimes wonder why we’re here.


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